The hardest part of writing a blog is just writing it. 

I’m a doer. I interact with the physical world. My brain and my body are geared around this. 

But having to type words to describe in a two dimensional way what I do in three dimensions seems unproductive, arduous, and inconceivable. Action and thought are polar opposites. Yet, they say it’s good for you to journal, read stories, and write. 

So…what do I write?

Usually, I write about whatever new thing I’m learning or whatever new injustice or corrupt system I’m angry at. I desire to bring change to the world and I usually see so much injustice that I feel overwhelmed by the shear enormity of its unsolvability. Even after I try to come up with solutions of how to help people change, in the end, I know it doesn’t matter because there will still arise other injustices in its place. So, what’s the point?

The point is that I’m at war with hope and despair. I’m 34 years old and I’ve experienced enough heartache to stop hoping that there will be goodness, delight, pleasure, satisfaction, and fulfillment in relationships. There’s too much pain from people who lust and murder in their hearts, which comes out in damaging behaviors, words, and ruptured relationships that never repair. 

How often have I experienced a relationship shatter when conflict and hurt are unresolved. Or, when someone is offended or hurt without my knowledge and suddenly the relationship changes. I’m left wondering what happened. But will he or she be able to repair? Does the person have the capacity to repair by owning failures, attuning to the hurt, or bearing the effect I experienced without going to contempt? Probably not. 

This leaves me very desperate, despairing, and hopeless that I will find goodness in friends and loved ones. 

…

…and yet, there’s still hope. But will my hope be fulfilled, or is it just a figment, a vapor, or an illusion…maybe even a delusion to hope again? 

I need the help of faith and trust to come along side of my wavering hope and help it along. But here again lies a dilemma. Who can be trusted? They’ll all eventually hurt me. But will they be able to repair? …In my experience: no.

So how can I love if I don’t have the bedrock of faith and hope?

How does Jesus restore faith, hope, and love? 

If evil and satan assault faith through betrayal, then how does the gospel restore faith and trust? 

If evil brings about the loss of hope through disappointment, futility, and despair, then how does the gospel restore a belief that there will be goodness, pleasure, and delight in the future? 

If evil seeks love’s destruction through contempt, blame, emptiness, idolatry, and murder, then how does the gospel redeem joy, delight, honor, and goodness?

FAITH ASSAULTED

Look at the story of Jesus in Gethsemane right before he is given over to the religious leaders for trial. Jesus’ trust in his disciples, in his Father, and his enemies is under attack. When Jesus needed his disciples there for him during his darkest and most troubling time, his friends were weighed down with anxiety. Jesus was in distress and his soul greatly troubled. His friends didn’t know how to engage with him in prayer. Jesus experienced his friends abandoning him in his darkest hour. 

Now, I don’t know about you, but if I were Jesus, right about then I would’ve been so hurt by my friends that I would’ve turned against them in anger for not being there for me like I needed them to be. And Jesus felt hurt. He didn’t deny it. Jesus’ own words to his disciples were, “…could you not spend one hour praying with me?” 

Jesus’ trust in his Father was under attack and is expressed through Jesus’ words, “If it’s possible, let this cup pass from me. Yet, not my will, but your’s be done.”

FAITH RESTORED

So, how does Jesus’ crucifixion restore trust? Trust is restored because Jesus is resurrected from the dead. Jesus resurrects trust because God’s promises and prophesies are true! God’s track record is 100%. And, he restores trust in those who abandoned him by repairing the relationships with each disciple. 

HOPE ASSAULTED

Evil assaults Jesus’ hope through a prolonged and intense mocking, unjust prosecution, and crucifixion. Evil attempted to blot out Jesus’ hope that what he was doing was for a greater purpose. And in the midst of it all, he didn’t reject those who rejected him. He rejected the religious leaders’ vows and covenants to maintain their positions of power and authority. Why? Because the religious leaders of Jesus’ time enslaved people to wicked religious structures of legalism, do’s and don’ts, and bondage to shame. 

HOPE RESTORED

The gospel restores hope through the resurrection of Jesus. Just when the worst has happened and all dreams and imagination have vanished. Just when the disciples’ hearts are vowing never to believe or hope again like they did that Jesus was restoring Israel, all their hopes and dreams were shattered. Their Messiah, Savior, and King, was murdered – dead. Jesus comes back to life and plays with his disciples through the humor of letting them discover who he is. 

LOVE ASSAULTED

Jesus’ love for humanity is attacked on every front. His love for his Father, his love for his disciples, his love for his enemies, and his love for the world is attacked through evil. The temptation was to remove his love and become self-sufficient, self-preserving, self-serving. 

LOVE RESTORED

Yet, he loved the world so much that he was willing to take the place I deserved as a substitution for the penalty of my failures. And not just mine – each and every person who has ever lived or will live. Love is restored through the very act of crucifixion, the hope of resurrection, and the joy of reigning with Christ.

And so, the application to my life of what to do about people who betray, reject, abandon, idolize, and murder me, is to remember what my God has created for me. It is to try again when there’s been a failure in a relationship. Yes, I need the help of wisdom to determine what type of person this is and his or her capacity to repair. Some people are not capable. But whether or not I can attempt to repair and re-establish faith, hope, and love in a relationship is provided through the empowering reality of Jesus’ life – the gospel. Who am I doing this for? Is it for me, or for my Lord, King, and Savior? Who do I fear – man, or God?